Nothin’ Like a Good Old Existential Meltdown

I recently found a new site–Not Always Right.  It’s got some hilarious stories there, and I have to highlight one:

Nothin’ Like A Good Old Existential Meltdown

(Confronted by a customer with an extremely high pitched voice and impenetrable Highland accent. This is one of those tiny old Scottish women with a headscarf nailed on and muscles like steel wires. They are a common sight in the East of Scotland, and are almost immortal. Only the slow action of the wind off the north sea will gradually erode them.)

Me: “That will be £***, please.”

Old Lady: “Areyenamerican?”

Me: “I beg your pardon?”

Old Lady: “Ah sid, are ye Namerican?”

Me: “I’m sorry, I missed that.”

Old Lady: “Are… ye… an… American?”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry. I misheard you. No, I’m English.”

Old Lady: “Oh… why?”

(I have spent much of the last three years trying to come up with a satisfactory answer. As yet I have made no progress.)

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4 Comments

  1. Christopher said,

    14 July 2008 at 1:39 pm

    The light shines on white marble.

  2. bren said,

    14 July 2008 at 8:57 pm

    1. If A is true, then B is true.
    2. B is stated to be true.
    3. Therefore, A must be true.

  3. Christopher said,

    14 July 2008 at 10:17 pm

    Adjective nouns1 verb nouns2.

  4. bren said,

    14 July 2008 at 11:03 pm

    A=A because A=A


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